Building a case for homeschooling
It’s amazing how suddenly an idea can come to you and replace the way you previously viewed the world. Erin has recently read a great deal about homeschooling, approached me with the idea as something to consider for our children and whammo! I am now in the process of building a case for (or against) it.
In my usual fashion of research, I am doing a lot of talking about it with my friends and other resources. Erin reads. I talk. So for the next few months, expect to see arguments for and against the idea on this blog.
As much as you are probably initially shocked that I am considering it (I am shocked myself, to be honest) when you think about it, there are ever so many compelling reasons for and fewer reasons against it. Most of my reasons against it are purely selfish. I was quite looking forward to getting some time back for myself and to contribute more financially to our household dreams of renovations and travel. Also, I worry that I will not teach them correctly, though this is less of a fear with Erin in the house. Plus, I already struggle with a lack of personal space.
The biggest reason against homeschooling seems to be the socialization element that I agree is so important. More on this in another post but the short story is I am a very social person and would join at least one local homeschool group that meets regularly to combat this very issue. On the plus side, without the peers at school, they are less likely to be bullied and have to deal with peer pressure if they don’t go to school. This has always been a big concern of mine as the mother of daughters. Have you HEARD what happens at parties these days? Please tell me you mothers of boys are on it! As one mother of a boy I know so appropriately put it “I only have to worry about one penis. You have to worry about all of them.” We can all hope if we raise our kids well, they won’t partake in less desirable passtimes.
I will end this post for now and tell you about the pros and cons in individual posts. But do understand that I am not considering this because I am against public education. Indeed, I love our little neighbourhood school and it was one of the reasons we purchased this house, it being walking distance to one of the best elementary schools in South Surrey and one of the best public high schools in the province. This is just a lifestyle choice that we are considering.
I welcome your comments on the subject. Fire away!
Why wouldn’t I be one of the first to comment. I support home schooling if it is the right fit for the kids and family. We have a fantastic family on our street that is homeschooling the three older children in their family (the other two are still wee). They are some of the kindest most considerate children I’ve ever met. The also have a ton of family support and have a faith based family value system.
The aspect of bullying and peer pressure is an interesting one. I am not pro-bullying. But some of the teasing and friendship heartaches can be opportunities to discuss how we treat people and empowering to children in confronting and coming through the experience. We can’t shelter our kids from everything. Now this sheltering happens no matter where we educate our children. Children need to learn how to deal with that sort of conflict and I’m not saying school is the best place to do so, but it’s the most convenient.
My questions would be…when you think about your own educations what were the best parts? What were the worst? How will you be able to offer the best for your own children? Make a plan for how many years you will homeschool for? The primary? All of it? How would the transition to school go?
Personally, I know it’s not for me. I love the experiences Morgan is already having at school, what he is learning (I don’t want the sole responsibility for his education). What I do love is the ability to augment his learning at home. When Tess is talking about Africa at preschool, I share my photos, stories, artifacts. When Morgan is approaching his Math-a-thon, I come up with interesting ways to help him recognize his numbers and say them in French.
I’ll be interested in the ongoing discussion around this.
This is indeed an interesting debate. In fact, after Loch and I read your blog entry we ended up in a way-past-bedtime discussion about parenting. That’s right - parenting not education. To begin, there are lots of reasons why I wouldn’t choose to homeschool. One being that I enjoy my work and I value the time I have away from my children. I consider this to be selfish, but only in the most wonderful and productive way. When I have time to myself and I am fulfilled intellectually - I am by far a better Mom. I value the example I’m setting for my children and I see that, for them, the routine is important. Secondly, I am intending on putting my kids in French immersion. This, I would not be able to do at home simply because my ability to communicate in French is sketchy and my ability to teach it is nil. I could say the same about math, but given who I"m married to I don’t suppose that would be a problem.
I think that how we choose to educate our kids goes hand in hand with our parenting style. I don’t think that public/privately educated child will necessarily be more considerate, socialized, polite or intellectually brilliant than a home schooled one. Or, vice versa. And, while I think your argument about protecting our children from bullying and peer pressure is an interesting one - I’m not convinced that shielding them from the challenges of socialization serve them in their adult lives. After all, we only have our children under our roofs for 17 or 18 years. That first year of university will have plenty of undesirable creatures and parties and many a peer pressure situation. I believe that we need to establish communication with our kids and help them through the difficult situations. I grew up in the shadow of a brother who was severely bullied and had my own host of heartbreak and peer pressure situations to deal with. Perhaps, I would have preferred not to have experienced these challenges, but I also know that they taught me much about conflict resolution and sticking up for myself and others.
As for protecting our daughters from all the penises in the world (I know I don’t have one, butI do have a niece and I also feel profoundly protective of my friends’ little girls). I was sexually assaulted during my first year of University. It broke my mother’s heart. She kept saying to me “this was not supposed to happen to you.” But, really, how could she have shielded me from this? It wasn’t her responsibility. I was out of the house, away from her care and starting my own life. How I picked up the pieces, however, was directly related to her and how she showed me that we are not defined by what other’s do to us. This was an important lesson for me.
And, don’t you worry. I take my responsibility as a mother of two sons very seriously. I am attempting to raise my children to treat all people with respect and to teach them to respect themselves. I’m not under any illusion that sending them to school will be easy, but I am hoping that we will be able to guide them through the tough bits. Indeed I have many fears based on my own experiences as a middle school wall flower. But, I know that my children are not me and I don’t want to let my fears prevent them from experiencing all that life has to offer, the good and the bad. After all, they don’t belong to me. I’ve just been giving the profound privilege and responsibility of standing by them while they work their way towards adulthood. And, while letting them go is hard it also gives me great joy to see them stand on their own two feet.
How we choose to educate our children is a profoundly personal decision. I don’t think there is any right or wrong method. Rather, it all boils down to what works for individual families. Just because I need time/space away from my children doesn’t mean my neighbour does. Equally, just because I don’t want the responsibility for being their sole educator doesn’t mean my friend down the street doesn’t want to our shouldn’t take this on her/himself.
Do what works for you, I say. Just remember to be honest about your own needs - and don’t feel bad about them - and be honest about your children’s needs and have confidence that whichever way you choose to educate them - remember they are bright & wonderful people who will thrive.
Home schooling pro: Lunch may contain nut.
My parents were both public school teachers in BC, dad for 15 years, mom for just shy of 30. They have stated clearly that they wish they’d home schooled me. And the system is floundering more now than ever.
But, yeah ... massive commitment.
On the bright side, you get to learn algebra again! Fun times.
Why exactly did we go to university?
http://graphjam.com/2010/02/02/funny-graphs-university-education/
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